Not more about new years resolutions !
Yes, but with a bit of a twist & yes losing weight is possible (read to the end for this).
Hello everyone
Welcome to 2025, a new year.
Picture credit : Photo by Edu Lauton on Unsplash
That is if you follow what is known as the Gregorian calendar that has been in existence since 1582. I love a bit of history. Feel free to skip forward if history is not your bag, I am not gonna go on about for it long! Most of the world follow this calendar these days. Pope Gregory XIII decided he would create, a calendar in his name (of course) to replace what had been used prior to this, the Julian Calendar.
Unsurprisingly the Julian Calendar relates to Julius Caesar and can be traced back to 45 BC (or BCE if you prefer) Incredible!
I have read a bit about around this, nerdy fascination on my part and I can’t really find much difference between the two, other than how they determine leap years. There are far more similarities, make of that what you may! If you are reading this and have a better understanding of it, I would genuinely be fascinated to know!
So my year has got off to a nerdy start! That is ok, I am a very curious person, and I personally think curiosity is a great trait.
What is the point of all this? Originally I was interested in how long we have been torturing ourselves with new years resolutions and then got off to that tangent of calendars, of which there is sooooo much more, but I don’t want to bore you to sleep.
Again, as I started reading around my original question, I have found some conflicting answers. However, I am gonna go with the one I really like. That these resolutions have been around for 4000 years. 4000 YEARS, really? We are now in the time of Babylonians at 4000 years ago, and they recorded their celebrations around New Year. I am not going to get into which calendar they were using, phew, I hear you think.
To quote the Sky history channel:
“They also made promises to the gods to pay their debts and return any objects they had borrowed. These promises could be considered the forerunners of our New Year’s resolutions. If the Babylonians kept to their word, their (pagan) gods would bestow favour on them for the coming year. If not, they would fall out of the gods’ favour—a place no one wanted to be.”
Well we may have changed a bit from that time, but the fear of failure of a new years resolution that we have probably publicly declared is still real.
I am not, personally, totally against new years resolutions but I am not that keen on them, that you have probably gleaned from my past writings. I think trying to lose 2 stone is a great aspiration but trying to do that by March is a bit unrealistic for most of us. Let alone, it is not a plan at all. It is way too big.
On top of that, most people “fail” with their resolutions at the latest by February, most earlier. I don’t think its great to bash our self esteem so early on in the year.
Personally, I am all for setting myself up to succeed (not that I will at everything, but it is also ok to come back to things later in the year or 2028 as you prefer). Having a go, never hurt anyone, as we learn from that, eh? We certainly learn, many ways to not achieve things. That is valuable in itself.
As humans we love stories. We listen to other’s stories and we take things from it that we can use and discard the rest, so with that intention in mind, here is my story, currently in my head for this year. It is a ridiculous list, so I KNOW some of this is not gonna happen in 2025, BUT I will be sowing the seeds for it for time to come.
Move back to England - fraught with challenges, lets see what happens, it is a 700 mile move. I will be kind and fair to myself about it.
I need to break this one down
I need to think about how I break it down into achievable goals that I can work my way through without going mad.
= my resolution or rather intention, is about writing the plan which will have many amendments, which is ok. Flexibility is my key with this one and time flexibility in particular. I recognise my dream and reality will probably be different.
Keep writing to my Substack. I can do this. I enjoy it, it feels good. Also if I miss a week, will you all hate me? I doubt it! No resolution required. Intention is there.
Write a book. So the amazing Claire Venus over at
has already planned this for me and many others. To write it over 12 months. I have an idea, I need to hone it and follow her plan. In my moments of despair over it, that I predict will happen, I will have that community’s amazing support. I can do this. No resolution required. Intention is there. Support for something difficult, in place. I need to remember to be fair to myself for trying something new.Continue to develop and launch my self-esteem courses. This is something I need to think about as this is a huge learning curve for me. So I am going to schedule some time in my diary to think about how to start doing this as I have not started yet. That is it, I need to find a way to start. No resolution required. Intention is there and acknowledge I am not sure how I am going to do this, so the first step is to find the way forward. I also have coaching support for this venture.
To spend less time in front of the computer, to be more productive. Sound weird, actually no. My learning from last year is that I would spend 13 hours on the computer in frantic concentration to then be wiped out for the next 2 days and not able to do anything else as I could not concentrate. So I need to develop a bit more discipline about my start time and my end time and see if say, 5 hours a day makes me more productive. I have a new creative business in the works, that needs my time too, I need to create time to do it and that is away from the computer and something I love doing. No resolution required. This is an experiment that is flexible to tweaking.
I feel quite set free by how I am thinking about my year ahead. I don’t need to make resolutions, just set my intentions about what I want from my life in a way that sets me up to succeed. For me, these ideas above are the most important things I want to pour my energy into. It will be interesting to see what happens.
Picture credit: Photo by Luca Upper on Unsplash
A client example (this is a popular one that leads people to states of hysteria and despair when it doesn’t happen) : I need to lose 3 stone for health reasons but how I am going to do that. I have failed so many times in the past. In small incremental steps is what we discussed. She is going to start with learning to read food labels. You will be surprised what is in the food you eat.
Let’s name and shame Quaker Oat Granola, Golden Crunch, claiming it is 30% less fat. Well it maybe, but 30% less fat than what exactly? However, and I am no dietician, this is common sense, when you look at the label, what do you see? and I quote “rolled oats (62%), sugar, glucose syrup, sunflower oil” then …..additive, additive, chemical oh more sugar, honey (no goodness left in that at all after what I am sure they have done to it). Per 100g there is 19 grams of sugar and there is NO protein, not one nut (I thought granola had nuts?) in it. There is also 71 grams of carbs per 100 grams. So 100 g gives you 426 kcals. There is no natural nutrition in that whatsoever. There is a LOT Of sugar and carbs though. Not great if you want to lose weight!
So by simply starting to take an interest (here we have curiosity again) in what is actually in the food you eat, you could make some subtle swaps that could drastically change your diet. As I am not a dietician, I am not going to go further, you don’t need to be, you just need curiosity, common sense and move away from sugar and carbs and towards natural unprocessed foods.
How can you use my story, to set yourself up to succeed in this brand new year? What has resonated with you? Even if it is just one thing, run with it. Make it your own, make it work for you. Change it, hone it, enjoy it. Find ways to enjoy it. We tend to stick with things we enjoy.
I would love to hear!
Wishing your a curious and satisfying (at least at times) new year.
With all kind wishes,
Jane
Cognitive Psychotherapist and Coach (BABCP accredited)
Floreo (Latin for flourish) Self-esteem is not just about confidence, it is the foundation of your human experience. It is your right to feel comfortable with yourself and flourish.
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